Pay It Forward

For days, it seems like my husband and I have been waiving at each other as we pass, running this way and that, accomplishing great deeds and domestic responsibility. I was hoping for a nice evening at home today, as the Young Men's activity started and ended early.

While he was gone with the Young Men, the phone rang. It was - yet again - someone wondering if they could borrow my husband's skills/tools/time/know-how. I promised to tell him they had called. On the inside, I didn't want to. I was feeling selfish and thwarted and sulky about it. Even so, I relayed the message. My husband smacked his forehead, exclaimed that he had forgotten to follow up on a promise to help, kissed me good-bye, and hurried out the door.

More sulking.

It was past bedtime when he got back. I had diapered and pajama'd everyone, the lights were mostly out and only a few stragglers left to tuck in when he walked in the door. It's not him, I'm glad he is so intrinsically useful. I am very glad he is so willing to help, and so chronically service-minded.

I'm conflicted, let's just leave it at that.

Anyway, he walked in the door, and plunked a HUGE jar of gourmet jelly beans down on my nightstand. It was a thank-you from the family he had been helping. They don't have the skills/tools/time/know-how my husband has. But we don't have a stash of gourmet jelly beans.

My heart was softened. I'm pretty sure people know how I get feeling. I am not good at suffering in silence. But just having it acknowledged, that feels really good. And the jelly beans are yummy.

Not that it's about the jelly beans. It's the concept. When one cannot pay it back, one can always pay it forward. I am grateful for paying it forward, for payment in kind, for kindness returned.

What have you been blessed with today?